Review: 2PM - Come Back When You Hear This Song

I actually wrote this ages and ages ago, but I got so caught up with my school stuff that I never got to add the finishing touches. Anyway, 2PM released two music videos, so I will be doing two 2PM songs in a row. However, I need to warn all the Hottest out there, this is not going to be a pretty review. So if you can't take it, I'm giving you all a chance to back off and give me the finger before you get hurt. You have been warned~~

Music Video
I actually wasn't going to review this song. I heard A.D.T.O.Y and I liked it a lot better. But I was really into the music video so I changed my mind.

The video was super interesting. When I first watched it, I thought that it was about a girl breaking up with her jerk boyfriend. And for some reason, there were references of the seven sins scattered all over the place. But the video actually has a deeper meaning to it, which I shall now break down piece by piece.

The first scene was the girl with Chansung playing bingo on the bed. He switches off the light and the word LUST is reflected on the sheets. That's pretty self-explanatory, I don't think I need to delve further into it. When the girl wakes up, she looks around dodgily before dressing up and running off, leaving Chansung all by his lonesome. Couldn't satisfy a girl, Chansung? I gotta say, I didn't expect that from you.

Judging you.

Next scene is when the girl goes to meet Nickhun, who has prepared a romantic poolside dinner especially for her. But just as she was exclaiming her joy, suddenly he gets a call from GREED company (Killer name, by the way). She gets mad at his money-making greediness and leaves him too. Although now that I think about it, there might have been other reasons.

Pictured: Romantic.

Later, you see her with Wooyoung at U Kiss's and Teen Top's old apartment trying to get him to play a song on the piano, which is titled SLOTH. She keeps nagging and nagging, but Wooyoung is too lazy to get his bum off the couch. Aggravated, he throws the sheet music at her face and stalks off. So, she breaks up with him too, I guess.

Next you see her in an apartment , trying to convince Junho to stop drinking. But Junho has been hit with a hard case of GLUTTONY, as indicated by the bottle he's chugging down. And also the three bottles beside him. And probably the entire stock of alcohol he has right in front of him. Who the hell has that much booze??

Above: every frat boy's dream.

Anyway, by now she has had enough and asks Junsu to give her a lift in his fancy car. By the way, nice placing of WRATH on the car plate, I almost didn't see it. Also I'm a little confused with her interaction with Junsu since he was nice enough to give her a lift and everything and she thanked him by slapping him and stalking off. She's the one with the wrath if anything.
 

 

"I wanted a Lamborghini!!"

Finally the last scene is when she flirts with a random waiter, and he gets scared off immediately by Taecyeon who has this rocking scene where he pushes open the kitchen door to reveal......a completely empty kitchen. Aren't kitchens usually the busiest room in the whole building?

Also I think they may have gotten Taec's sin wrong. As you can see in the picture next to him as he grabs his girl roughly by the chin, the sin he was supposed to portray was ENVY. But I think the directors confused the term ENVY with JEALOUSY. See, if it was jealousy, Taec sees his girl flirting with a guy, he gets jealous, he flips out. Makes sense. But if it was envy, was Taec supposed to be envious of his girl for her flirting skills? That would take Taec to a place I really don't want to go.

The song is called Come Back When You Hear This Song. I'm not going to lie, I didn't like the song. Seriously, it didn't match 2PM's style of music at all. Hands Up was great and I hoped that they would keep moving in that direction. But this song was nothing short of disappointing. In fact, the only part I did like was Taec's rap. So two thumbs up, Taec.

Lyrics-wise, the song is about a girl who broke up with her boyfriend because he didn't treat her well when they were together. And the guy regrets treating her that way and wants her back. It kind of relates to the video: Nickhun answers a company call rather than give her his undivided attention. Junsu has the audacity to give her a lift in his wrath-filled car. Taec is a time-bomb of jealous rage. Wooyoung is a lazy bum, Junho is an gluttonous alcoholic and Chansung is too......erm, lusty?

Judging you again.

Anyhow none of that matters. When she hears the members singing to her, telling her to come back when she hears this song, she realizes that she has to throw down her PRIDE. Which she does, quite literally, and runs back to them.

But I think they missed out a vital part in the whole video. The girl was dating all six members of 2PM at the friggin' same time. Yes, it happens in other videos and it remains a constant source of irritation for me. But at least for other groups, they made an effort to hide it by having each of the members appear at different locations with the girl. In this video however, they have this joyful reunion on the rooftop. All seven of them.  Your girlfriend six-timed you, dumped you and now want to get back together with all six of you. At the same time. I really can't stress that enough.

But wait, that means all the members already know that she's playing them like a fiddle. And not only are they okay with that, they even serenade to her after she broke up with them. Guys, I'm sure there are better fish in the ocean.

Pictured: Fish.

Dance
You know, I had my misgivings about their running man dance and their Heartbeat zombie dance, but this is officially the weakest dance 2PM has ever come up with. Seriously, this is way below the level I had expected from them.

Don't defend them, Hottest. You know it's true. I mean, this is 2PM, first generation beast idols. This is the group that debuted with somersaults, cartwheels and handstands. They remain to this day the only idol group I've seen where every member is capable of doing a backflip. Even though they've moved on from acrobatics to simply ripping their shirts off on stage, at least they embodied the term Beast Idol. I have always looked forward to seeing them dance. Until now.

Some of you might argue that they are trying to be more mature, given that their album is called Grown and all, but come on, they pretend to be an aeroplane during the chorus.

"Wheeeee!!"

But that's nothing. The part that shriveled up my guts and made me want to curl up in a corner and watch the rest of the video between my fingers was the Twinkle Twinkle Little Star part. You know which part I'm talking about right? Of course you do, don't play that game. It was so......gut-curling. I don't know how else to describe it. Even 2PM thinks it's weird. Or at least Taec does. Look at his face. He's obviously trying really hard not to either burst into laughter or sob in despair.

Either way, it's a face of total agony.

Fashion
Rest assured, I have no complaints here. All the members look really good. I guess you can't really go wrong with button-ups and suspenders. But Taec, I have to say I prefer your old hairstyle. I think I've said this before, but currypuff hair really don't look good on anyone unless they are aging, portly businessmen.

To all the Hottest out there who stuck to this post until now, I'm sorry I couldn't say anything nice about 2PM. I used to be a Hottest so I still have a soft spot for them. I think they're great, but this song just wasn't good.

Crazy Busy Mind

Hi guys, sorry I can't come up with a new review last week but i have been overwhelmed by assignments, exams and last minute reports. My semester break is in two weeks time and everything from the beginning of the semester has been piling up to this moment. But I'm already working on a new review. It should be out this week. Cheers~

5 Random Facts About Me

Because I'm bored and I don't want my blog to be solely about Kpop. That in itself is pretty lifeless. Here are five facts that even my family might not know about me, so it makes perfect sense to post it in public domain for the world to see.

1. I can speed-read. I taught myself from the hundreds of books I inhaled over my life time. My current record is 9.5 seconds for 100 words.

2. For those of you who don't already know, I am a huge fan of Jay Park and U Kiss. Besides having great songs, they are also genuinely nice people cuz why idolized people who are douches?

3. I really don't like colored contact lenses, especially black ones. I have never worn any and I cannot for the life of me understand why anyone would want to look like a life-sized barbie doll.

4. I have motion-sickness. Going to school every day when I was young used to be a torture because by the time I got there, I would be a few minutes away from throwing up. That's how bad it was. Now when I go for long trips, I don't sleep the night before so I can sleep on the road.

5. I kind of like snakes. Ask most people what they are afraid of and most of the time their answer will be snakes. But I don't know, I think baby snakes with their round, beady black eyes are kind of cute in a baby-animal kind of way. But then again, pythons are kind of cute too, especially those albino ones who are too fat to do anything besides slither alongside you.

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Above: Gwiyomi.

That was fun =D I will probably continue posting facts about myself although not that frequently. Please let me know if my lack of modesty makes you want to rip your hair out though, and I will stop.

Review: UBeat - Should've Treated You Better

U Kiss's first unit group! How could I let this opportunity pass? Also to UBeat, I officially reject the name Heartbeat. Sorry, but I like BeatMe. It just really stands out somehow =P

Music Video
I have a confession to make. I don't usually do this, but I watched S&M's interview with UBeat before I started writing this review. I want to interview celebrities too!!

Anyway, they talked a little about the concept behind the video which confirmed something to me. I definitely don't operate on the same wavelength as U Kiss video directors. Because the angle they were going for was that Eli's girlfriend had died, and now he missed her and wanted her to come back to him.

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 Although probably not like this.

In 0330, it was really obvious that the female character had died. But when I watched Should've Treated You Better, it didn't feel like that to me. It looked to me like Eli and his girlfriend broke up, but he was still in love with her. So he sort of watches her longingly from a distance, hoping that she would come back to him.

Eli was the main character in the video. There wasn't a lot of acting in this video, it was mostly close-up shots so he had to show all that loneliness and longing through his expression. But I thought he did really well. However, there was this part where he and his girlfriend both had their hands stretched out like they were trying to hold on to each other, and there were rose petals floating along the side. I don't think I was supposed to find that scene funny, but honestly I couldn't help myself.

Pictured: Hilarious.

This song had so much potential that I had hoped for a stronger plot like 0330, but regardless I'm glad that there was an actual storyline this time rather than it just being a dance video. My one complaint about the video would have to be the frames which show the members standing there and singing. There were so many of them that they disrupted the flow of the storyline. I think the editors should have kept it as a plot-driven video and just added a couple of those frames here and there.

"But how can our hotness be expressed in just a few frames?"

Anyway, on the subject of their homelessness. UBeat, are you still house-hunting?? Looks like it to me. Only instead of house-hunting at abandoned buildings, this time they are looking for houses that are under bridges or in the middle of the friggin' sea.

"Hmm, not bad. Could use more water though."

I think it's time to consider getting a professional. You guys are way in over your heads. Eli, I hate to break it down for you, but I think your girlfriend might have broken up with you because of your bad taste in real estate.

"I knew it was hopeless as soon as I saw the abandoned warehouse."

Song and Lyrics
Should've Treated You Better was a good song, but I didn't like it as much as Standing Still. I liked it, but I didn't like like it.

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"I mean, I love you. I'm just not in love with you....."

To quote Eli, the song had a very upbeat tempo, but sad lyrics. That sums it up pretty well, I can't add anything more to it. The lyrics were so friggin' sad, it stirred up all the emotional cockles of my heart and made me want to cry after hearing it. T^T

To me, it wasn't really a Bruno-Mars-When-I-Was-Your-Man kind of song, the lyrics was more about the guy going through a breakup and how much he missed his girlfriend and wanted her back.

One issue about the song which has been thoroughly discussed amongst the BeatMe community was that AJ and Eli weren't given enough parts in the song, especially since it was supposed to be their subunit in the first place. I know that U Kiss managers tend to play it safe when it comes to U Kiss albums. That's why the vocal line usually carries the weight of every song. But seriously, don't stress. AJ and Eli are good singers, they should be allowed to shine as well.

Dance
There wasn't that much dancing in this video......Actually, there weren't any, besides a two-second shuffle to the right. Even their live performances doesn't have a lot of dancing so it's kind of difficult for me to comment about it. As compensation, here is a photo of AJ that I stole from his Twitter (Oh sh*t, I hope he doesn't kill me):

https://twitter.com/JaeseopKim91AJ

AJ. Charming fans since his debut.

Fashion
AJ, you restyled your hair! And dyed it too! This is definitely a better look for him than the one in Standing Still. They really do look good in blonde. Makes me wonder if they should do a BAP and coordinate hair colors.

There isn't much to say about their outfits. It's perfectly normal, except for a couple of DIY clothing tips they might have picked up from BAP.

I shouldn't make fun of them. After all, they're saving up to buy a house.

Review: Shinee - Why So Serious?

So......
Looking back at my blogs, I realize that the more I try to do in a limited amount of time, the less quality I put out. Also I noticed that in my review for Teen Top, I mistaken Chunji for Ricky. OH MY GOSH, I'm so sorry Angels! T^T I can't really remember who is who besides L Joe and Niel, so......Anyway, I have corrected the problem so rest assured.

Music Video
Okay, I was pretty disappointed with the music video. When you have a song titled Why So Serious?, you know that you're competing with the two people who immortalized that phrase: The Joker and GD. So I expected the video to be a SM styled version of Crayon, where the members forget that they're idols for three minutes and just go crazy. Can you imagine how cool it would be to see Shinee use toilet jokes?
 

Like this, but with Shinee and yelling "Why So Serious?".

This music video had exactly four colors: grey, red, black and white. It was so gloomy, I almost expected it to start raining. Not to mention that the girl seems to have the mindset of a five-year-old. Because she goes to see Shinee in their fancy white room and just like any girl who just got to meet Shinee in the flesh, she plays peek-a-boo with them. Wait, what?

And Shinee, you guys aren't off the hook either. What's with the shocked expressions? When the girl shows up their doorstep, they act as if they've never seen a girl in their life and therefore are stunned speechless.

"What is this odd creature?"

It's a girl, guys. They make up about half the human population. You guys share a company with like, 15 girls already. There is a girl across the street from where you're sitting right now. Don't get your knickers in a twist.

Anyway, when a policeman comes snooping around, they completely lose their minds and runs to hide. Unfortunately, they don't seem to have a good sense of what constitutes as hiding as they constantly peek their heads out to see if the policeman is gone yet. Tell me they don't remind you of a couple of kids playing hide-and-seek.

"You can't see us now, right?"

Once he's gone, they celebrate their success in fooling him by jumping up and down in joy. What's the deal? You guys are acting like the police guy is your dad coming to ground you for having a girl in your room. You are all adults now. You have your own house, you can invite whomever you damn well please, and there is nothing he can do about it.

Or it could be they are hiding because the police guy knows who stole his steering wheel.

Looking at you, Minho.

Song and Lyrics
Looking back at Sherlock, Dream Girl, and now Why So Serious?, I think Shinee has finally found their style of music and is sticking to that. The song was really loud and in your face in a rock-band kind of way, and it sounded like Shinee was yelling eighty percent of the time. That doesn't necessarily mean that it was a bad song though. However the problems I had with the song were basically the same as Sherlock, namely the chorus.

Back in Sherlock, I didn't like the chorus because loudly announcing to the world "I'm So Curious Yeah!" sounded weird no matter how you cut it. This time however, the part where they sang Why So Serious? sounded like they were trying to explain to a particular dense child why it had to be pronounced that way.

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"WHY. SO. SERIOUS. IT'S NOT THAT HARD!!!"

The song is about a zombie. I kid you not, Kpop loves their zombies.

Dance
I didn't like this dance as much as their Dream Girl mike stand dance, but I didn't dislike it as much as their Sherlock running man dance. There were no repeated parts in the choreography at all, not even in the chorus. And while I can appreciate how much effort it takes to learn the choreography, it kind of makes it hard to focus on any main points in the dance.

So this is what I have so far. Around the 0.37 second mark, the members did a sort of mummy-shuffle with their arms stretched out. Remember, it is a mummy-walk, not a zombie-walk. I know people think it's a zombie-walk because of MJ's Thriller dance, but the arms-stretched-out thing are mummies. Just Google Image Mummy.

Above: Not zombies.

Anyway, that part was cool. And so was the part just during Minho's rap at 2.33 seconds where they did that three-second moonwalk. But my favorite was definitely right before the rap where they all fall to the floor in unison in a half-split. I am still trying to figure out how they manage to do that without crying out in agony

They spent the next hour stuck in that postion.

Fashion
Shinee's outfits are normal and grey and non-commentable.

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Oh look, a puppy!

Review: 4Minute - What's Your Name?

I'm trying to cover 4Minute and Shinee as soon as possible. May is like, the Kpop Comeback Month since ALOT of groups will be making their comebacks. So I'm trying to get these songs done before that happens. Busy busy busy...

Music Video
I have very mixed feelings about this video. 4Minute videos usually focuses on them being dark and mysterious and sexy, but this time it was full of really bright and vibrant colors. Even though the girls played up their sexy side here as well, you see bits of aegyo here and there in their acting. And despite my zero-aegyo stand, surprisingly in this video it works.

However, I think we can all agree that this music video was pretty confusing, to say the least. So it starts off with 4Minute hitting the streets together, doing girly things like buying jewellery and hanging out with the neighbors. Some guys try to get fresh with them, only to be brushed off completely. Nothing wrong there, just a regular day with the girls.

It's only when they get back home, all hell breaks loose. One of the members sees on TV that everyone they met on the streets just turned into brain-eating zombies!

GAAHH- Wait, who's recording this?

That's when they look to the door just in time to see the zombies break in.The girls freak out and throw stuff at the zombies, before escaping into the streets. But the zombies quickly catch up to them and surround them in a hungry frenzy. The girls are completely overwhelmed by all the zombies clamoring for a taste of some sweet, sweet, grey matter. Just your typical, everyday zombie drama.

Pictured: Completely normal.

But then for some inexplicable reason, the zombies let them go and they do a dance number together. Ummm, what just happened? I'm pretty sure the zombies were tearing into you just a few seconds ago and suddenly you're all BFFs? I mean, they don't even seem to mind the fact that 4Minute have an entire wall of zombie heads that they probably beheaded themselves, all of them labeled as "No Name".

They're missing both their bodies and their dignity.

Actually if I recall correctly, Michael Jackson once did a zombie music video for Thriller. For those of you too young to know about it, it's kind of similar to this one if you squint, sans the girly pink and Hyuna's legs. However in MJ's video, he turned into a zombie in the end so at least it sort of makes sense. But here, the girls are like the Zombie Whisperers or something because not only do the zombies not eat them, they are just as smitten with the girls as they were when they were human. Okay 4Minute, you seriously need to get over and help out U Kiss with their zombie problem.

They're getting a little desperate.

Song and Lyrics
To be honest, I wasn't a huge fan of the song in the beginning, but it gradually grew on me. It had a cool, techno-funky beat and the chorus was really catchy as well. Although I did think that they repeated "What's Your Name" a little too much in the song. I don't really like songs with too repetitive lyrics. In my opinion, they should have removed the two lines of "What's Your Name" after Hyuna's rapping and added more lines to the rap instead, because her part was awesome.

The lyrics are a little different from what you would expect from a girl group. Whether it's a guy group singing about a girl, or a girl group singing about a guy, one thing usually remains constant: The guy always takes the lead. It kind of brings in the cultural thing. I'm Asian, and I can tell you that I don't know many girls with the habit of taking charge and asking a guy for his name and phone number. So I think it's so cool that this song is all about the girls being the dominant ones and demanding the guy to quit messing around and hand over his number.

Dance
I usually have no problems with 4Minute's dances. They are one of the few girl groups who manage to pull off fierce-sexy really well. I still kind of like this dance, but my no-problemness is starting to waver a little.

Let's talk about the good things first. I thought the first eight seconds where the members danced together before the lyrics started was pretty good. And I think a lot of people are going to disagree with me when I say this, but I actually did like Hyuna's part while she was rapping. She had a good expression and I don't think she overdid the sexiness there. It was good. Also I liked the shooing hand gesture when they sang "You Know My Name" at 1.01 minutes. It looked like they were being all dismissive and I-don't-need-you-Jerk. I thought it suited the lyrics of the song.

Now for the parts that cannot be unseen. I think the focus point in the dance was supposed to be the cellphone-waving part, but my mind decided that it wanted to focus on other parts instead, mainly the grab-and-point dance. You know, the part where the girls chose to point towards the most unfortunate direction of their body? No?

Now you know.

There were also some parts in the dance that I recognized from the dances of other songs. Did anyone else notice them? Yay, it's show-and-compare time!

 BAP's One Shot

2PM's Hands Up

 Hyuna's Bubble Pop

Oh yeah, I totally went there.

Seriously though, watching girl groups slide their hands between their legs is equally as disturbing as watching guy groups grab their crotches. It is not sexy, it is not flattering, it is not appealing in the least. Choreographers, please stop doing it.

Fashion
Most of the members look great in the video. Their clothes are eye-poppingly bright and awesomely mismatched. And their accessories, from their hairbands to their rings and bracelets, are equally amazing. Jihyun, I want your earrings.

 In fact, I have no complaints about them. Except for Hyuna.

What I'm going to say is basically what a ton of netizens have already complained about. Hyuna isn't wearing any pants. What she was wearing was is, to quote Simon, "I've never seen anything more mini in my life". And no, stylist, body paint and fishnets do not count as pants.

This pose does not help.

You are not helping her image by making her wear outfits like that. I get that you're trying to market her sex appeal, but this is getting way out of hand. It's time to stop before her rep gets permanently damaged.

Review: G Dragon - Michigo

So....
I really thought long and hard about which YG artist I wanted to review, but since I haven't done GD before, I decided to go with him. Also, Leehi's music video was so sombre and heart-wrenching that I felt almost bad to be tearing into it. With GD however, I have no such qualms. Muahahahaha~~

Music Video
I don't usually have a problem with GD's style of music. In fact, I thought Crayon was pretty awesome. But woah, this music video is insane. It starts off with GD riding on the creepiest subway train ever with a couple of people who look like they stumbled into this video by mistake on their way to Doll Master.

"The only mistake here is that you're still breathing. Let's fix that for you."

Just so you know, I take daily public trains that looks exactly like that minus the vandalism. So thanks GD, you are officially the second Kpop idol responsible for my newly occurring nightmares.

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These guys were the first.

Anyway, he enters the subway train and reads his book, minding his own business, when the music starts and all hell breaks loose. GD gets a different hairstyle out of nowhere and starts singing and rapping about going bonkers. Then the video goes on to show GD taking a leak, peeking at people who are taking a dump, at a clinic having his feet prodded with a fork, and getting shot at by himself with a gun shaped like a G, before ending with GD getting off the train, scratching his head like it was nothing more than a bad dream.

This wasn't my favorite song from GD. Besides the part of GD's rapping which was wicked as always, it wasn't as catchy as some of his previous songs. Now I know that the song title is Michigo which means crazy in Korean, and the lyrics were basically about GD wanting to go crazy. But I think he may have taken it a little too far this time. I mean, looking at all his solos up until now, his music videos have gotten steadily more insane than the last. Dude, I think you kind of need to rein it in a little, before it starts messing with your head.

Too late.

Now, this could be just my closeted love for raunchy fanfics speaking, but did anyone else notice the underlying R-rated themes throughout the video? We have:

Foot Fetish

Is...Is he smelling GD's foot??

S&M

Ermm, Toilet Fetish?

If such a thing exists.

And here I wanted to keep this blog PG. I tried, guys.

Dance
There isn't a prominent dance in this video. Most of the time GD does this really wild arm and leg flailing like some kind of weird four-armed, afro-wearing octopus. Actually, it kind of reminds me of Tarentallegra. As in Harry Potter, NOT Kim Junsu. Hey, wouldn't it be funny to imagine Harry Potter dancing to Tarentallegra?

 OMFG, my eyes!!!

Okay, bad idea. Anyway, in the middle of the video, GD gets dragged into a room to dance with this goth chick sporting a nose ring-chain. Now she was pretty awesome, albeit a little weird herself. I think she deserves a shout out here because had she appeared for more than ten seconds, she probably would have outshone GD.

Fashion
I don't even know where to begin. I mean, we're talking about GD here, so I can't really comment on his fashion like how I usually do. And besides, his outfits in the video are actually pretty normal, even though that square hat and waist-high shorts makes him look like Dr Penguin from Batman.

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They even have similar expressions of disdain. 

So the only issue I really have are with his collection of wigs, especially that bird's nest he was wearing on his head which somehow also has a spade stuck in it.

"It's for scooping out baby birds who get tangled up in there."